Meeting new people and Anxiety 

There is another kind of feeling that I usually deal with. There is actually no problem when I meet new people and talk with them. I don’t feel anxious. But when I realize that I’m gonna meet them again or they are gonna ask for my number or it is getting kinda serious, I do get anxious.

I feel like my heart beats faster and it’s just a little bit harder to breathe. Then these thoughts come to my mind what if I meet them again. What if he is a bad person? What if he is not my type? What if he takes advantage of me? What if we fight!!I feel like I should run away right now. Even if we both are chatting, laughing and having fun, it’s all same feelings.

These feelings are annoying. To avoid them, I have two options. Or maybe more options are out there but I don’t know about them yet! (if you know any, please let me know!)

One of them is to stay at my room. My safe and sound room! Second is to go out there but don’t have any eye contact with people to avoid starting any conversation. But I usually don’t choose one and stick with it. 

I randomly change my way of dealing with these feelings. Like one week I avoid any eye contact the other week I stay at home and the other week I just go out there and talk to people and experience these annoying feelings of anxiety again.

This is my life. It has been like this since I was a little kid. I’m not like choosing one and sticking with it till the end! I’m randomly changing my way of dealing with stuff. Now the period is not important. It can be daily, weekly or monthly.

Thanks for reading. Let me know if you feel the same or if you know any nice blogs about anxiety or depression. Stay beautiful:)

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6 thoughts on “Meeting new people and Anxiety 

  1. I have similar troubles. If I’m meeting non-social anxiety people, I feel like I can be less nervous, but if they want to get to know me or if I end up seeing the person more than once, I start freaking out because the person will want to get to know me better. My worst fear is the person will start to see the really bad parts of me. Many times in the past, I’ve avoided frequenting areas so I don’t end up bumping/running into the person. Ugh.

    I constantly flip flop with how I deal with my anxiety as well. I try to make myself attend at least one social anxiety meetup per week, but it’s always hard for me. I’m never 100% comfortable in the situation because I go through a variety of emotions and feelings during it. I feel upset that I’m feeling anxiety about meeting people and initiating conversation, and also angry that I want to be there but also don’t want to be there. I have yet to attend a meetup that’s not for social anxiety, so I don’t know how well I will fare around regular folks. And always, after attending just one meetup in a week, I feel exhausted and just want to go home, bury myself in my extracurricular hobbies, and never see people again. Then there are days where I make plans to go out and visit a museum or go sightseeing somewhere. I don’t know if I should feel this, but at times I can feel really lame because I’m essentially hanging out with myself. The good side to this is I get to be independent and I can go wherever I want without having to worry about whether the person with me is interested in going too. But then, I also feel dumb because I feel nervous about asking people if they would like to go with me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow. It’s same here. I’m amazed by how similar social anxiety people are to each other! I deeply feel like it when i read your sentences. There is a way to get better. I used it and I’m absolutely getting better now. Visit a psychiatrist. (Not psychologist) talk to him maybe take medication for a period. He/she might say in the mean time, talk to a psychologist/therapist. But to get rid of these feelings you have to visit psychiatrist. We can’t do it by our selves and no one is in our position so they won’t understand. And Because they don’t understand, they say everything is in your mind, you can solve it and stuff.. but I’ve tried my whole life to solve it by my self. But my improvements were slow. So I visited psychiatrist and used some medicine and now I’m feeling that I’m totally getting better. Thanks for reading and sharing your deep feelings with me.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I would say there have been some things in social anxiety I have been able to overcome on my own, but other things I think I need professional help with. It’s true, sometimes I feel ridiculous because the bigger aspects of social anxiety for me is basically having a lot of thought distortions in situations or being afraid people are viewing me in a negative light. These thoughts have made me miss out on a lot of things because I can’t always calm myself down or stick through a situation if I am feeling intense social anxiety. And at times, I feel angry at myself, like, why can’t I just stop thinking like this? Why can’t I just get over it?

        And yes, I do feel there is still a stigma on mental health. I was seeing a private therapist during my early college years, but I stopped because it was costly and my parents hated paying for my sessions. I still haven’t had a proper conversation with them about my social anxiety, and I don’t think they know what it actually is. They come from a culture that doesn’t talk about mental health, and everything is just done the old school way of dealing with it privately and keep moving on. It’s frustrating for me to see. Without going into too much detail, I will say I’ve seen my own parents deal with their mental health in some ways that is not exactly healthy, and it does more harm to themselves than good.

        If I do start seeing a therapist, it’ll be on my own terms. I never want to be financially dependent on them to pay for my sessions ever again. I’m currently unemployed because of my social anxiety issues, too.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yea, psychologist costs alot cause you visit weekly and it’s important to visit a psychologist but there is a chipper way, visiting psychiatrist. You visit monthly get ur medicine and u feel better by time:)

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I’m using them for almost two months and I’m not depressed, I say my ideas about everything without fear, I’m happier than ever, my relationship with my family is better and so on.. but it’s your choice

        Liked by 1 person

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